Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Just a short note because I have to go to class soon.
Will blog here about the camp and its impact on me hopefully soon.
However, time isn't on my side and I've been struck by fear and anxiety as the sem starts anew. Everyday I begin my day by saying a prayer, to bring me through the day. I don't want just to survive, I want to thrive. But honestly, I'll settle for not having any rude and sudden shocks throughout the day and that would be enough.
Like I said before, if coming to law school meant that this was God's way of showing me how true He is, then I think I'll accept it. But sometimes I don't know why I'm here, I feel stupid in comparison to the other law people and my hardworking tendacies are drastically inferior to many of them. I constantly ask God why He allowed me to fail my piano, many times you only realised a while after the event while He chose that path for you but for my piano, I cannot imagine what reason He had.
If it wasn't for POP, if it wasn't for His love, I don't think I'll be able to live. Life would be meaningless, and I can see how meaningless it is with day in day out readings and work.
He is my author of salvation and that's enough comfort.
I sometimes wish I could just find out immediately what's in store for me but it's probably too much for one to take. God knows what's best for us and if He doesn't settle for second best, I know I'm good enough for Him. So my prayer is that in this world where success is measured through results (school wise or work wise) that I shall see my success as the intangibles and that my faith in Him IS a success in itself.
christine danced till dawn at 9:35 PM
